Pregnancy Regressions: When Being Pregnant is Like Being a Child

Ah, the miracle of childbirth. With this, my first pregnancy, I have learned many things. As I reflect on some of those things, I realize there is a common thread. I’m basically behaving like a small child. How, you may ask? Well…
 
  • I have stuff all over myself and I can’t really explain how it got there (seriously…ALL. OVER.)
  • I have no sense of personal space and constantly bump into things (this gets really bad in public)
  • I am easily lost (I have honestly taken the wrong turn on on my daily commute for no reason other than pregnancy brain)…
  • …and I easily lose things (where is my phone? and where is my car? I have called my husband in tears because I can’t remember where I parked)
  • Someone else has to tie my shoes (also cue my husband having to deal with my tears)

(Bending over like this is no longer an option)

  • And speaking of shoes, last week these shoes fit fine and now I can barely squeeze my feet into them
  • I attempt to rationalize junk food for every meal (doughnuts for lunch? cheese pizza for dinner for the third day in a row? why not?!)
  • I choose my clothes based solely on comfort, never mind if they’re appropriate for the occasion (why yes, I will wear stretchy pants to work, thank you)
  • I whine about having to walk too far
  • I have to go to the bathroom at the most inopportune times…and then again 25 minutes later
  • Hangry is a way of life, so I constantly require snacks
  • Really irrational things make me cry and no one can talk me into being calm…but eating a snack helps.
  • Sometimes all I need is a nap!

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